Our dear wonderful kitty friend Abbey left this world Monday night. I miss her more than I can express. The thought of never enjoying a day in the company of her sweetness again makes my heart ache.
She left us rather suddenly after just a few days of lethargy. I tried all I could to help her regain her strength; giving her water from a medicine dropper and food from my pinky. I held her tiny weak body next to mine hoping to impart health through the love I hoped she'd absorb from me. In the end, she let her daddy know it was time to get her to a place where she could leave us, far away from our happy and lively memories of her. The moment we walked into the emergency vet's office, she began to literally take her dying breaths.
I have never felt so lonely in my own home. I have never felt so alone in my own skin. To say Abbey is part of me is not an overstatement nor an exaggeration. She transcended the 'normal' boundary between species (or maybe I did) to make us friends by any definition that exists. Our relationship was based on our personal brand of communication. I know 'pet people' know what I mean...communication with a cherished pet is something altogether different than with a cherished human. I believe it has to do with the process of bridging the language barrier. Since we don't share a verbal language, we have to rely on other types of communication, which in turn creates and fosters a deep and unique relationship. Other species possess different sensibilities, too, which put them in tune with different aspects of our personalities. In short, only a cat knows you like a cat can know you - and to be known by a cat is a beautiful feeling.
I am privileged to have been known and adored by a very special cat. Abbey filled my life with companionship and laughter. She warmed our home with her steadfast friendship and gentle nature. We shared our many moods and rhythms with her. In turn, she made us privy to the exquisite bliss to be found in a belly rub and a snuggle on a warm blanket.
I know that in time the hole will be filled with cherished memories of Abbey from the fifteen years she spent nuzzled in our lives and hearts. Eventually I will look at a picture of her basking upside down in her favorite sunny spot or remember how she loved to sit in her "cubby" in our headboard and a smile will cross my face. She will be forever my Original Upside Down Cat in my header and heart. For now, though, the wound is raw and the sting is sharp. My best kitty friend and I will make no new memories.
Abbey, not a day went by that I didn't thank my lucky stars for you. I only hope that we gave you the best life possible, filled with abundant love, deep devotion and all the chicken your heart desired. You deserved that and more, Sweet Poopy Girl.
Abbey Road Tilbrook Blitstein
May 8, 1994 - June 15, 2009
Thank you. Scott and I are still very sad mourning the loss of our little angel. It's hard to get on with life as usual with the emptyness in our home and hearts.
Knowing that you are thinking of us is helping us manage our grief day by day. We appreciate your wishes for us - they bring us strength.
Gina
It really touched us to hear from you! It was thoughtful of Felicia to send you a link to Abbey's tribute. She must know you'd understand exactly what we feel and are experiencing.
Yes, our life feels diminished without our sweet Abbey. This is one of the most difficult things we've ever dealt with. Thank goodness we have each other to lean on as we climb this mountain of grief.
I'm flattered you like my writing. Thank you for checking out my blog. It's not always sad, so I hope you'll stop by again to read what else is on my mind.
It was a treat seeing you at Mackenzie's party - you and Jim are among our favorite people!
Take care!
Gina
So I'm there with you this week, hon -
Four and a half years ago we were in a similar situation as you are with Holly with another of our dear cats, Penny. She was diagnosed with cancer and the vet told us it would be the greatest act of love we could show her to "put her out of her misery."
I cried for nearly 2 weeks in anticipation of the dreaded day we took her to that appointment. Our vet was so compassionate - he did such a wonderful job of helping us to know that it was the "rightest" thing we could do - regardless of how sad it made us feel. But it was still an agonizing ordeal.
With Abbey it was sudden and with Penny we had time to prepare ourselves but I think the moral of the story is that no matter the circumstances, it sucks. We are going to feel awful and grieve deeply - because we loved deeply.
I wish I could give you comfort in your time of sadness. Know that our hearts are with you as you say "Goodbye" to your friend.
All the best from one pet lover to another.
Gina
The next step is bringing her home...not sure if that will be cathartic in a good or bad way.
It means the world to us knowing that your heart is with us. We appreciate it more than we can express. Thanks for being here.
Gina
Hey, I found your blog in a new directory of blogs. I dont know how your blog came up, must have been a typo, anyway cool blog, I bookmarked you.
-Robert Shumake Paul Nicoletti