One of my clients forwards me these women vs. men emails from time to time. Click
read more below to read what she sent. These are very prevalent forwards, and I even hear acquaintances throw out the occasional, “That’s a man for you!” dis. I just need a reality check…women don’t
really feel that way about men, do they? Although some of them are funny in an ‘ouch’ sort of way, most are mean-spirited, hostile and demeaning toward men.
No wonder there is such a gap between the sexes! If we are relying on pat, stereotypical ‘cartoons’ on which to base our real life interactions, there is no hope of bridging the divide.
The way to fight the notion that women are oppressed or disrespected by men is not to retaliate with the same below the belt “humor” of which women have been the subject for years, e.g., blonde jokes. Come on, ladies, let’s be the bigger man and strive to
uplift our relationships instead of dragging them down to that level! Your man isn’t really a doofus, is he? Then why are you treating him like you are superior and he doesn’t have any sense at all? And if he is a doofus, why are you with him? Are you looking to earn "martyr points?"
Please don’t think of me as a tight-ass who wouldn’t know a joke if she slipped on it like a banana peel. Obviously I do recognize that their humor comes from the fact that they contain a kernel or two of truth...
…I just want to know that
everyone recognizes that they are jokes and not a thinly veiled passive-aggressive rant against those “pathetic men,”
disguised as humor.
WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.
WOMEN'S REVENGE
"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet, I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.
"No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally."
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,
pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,
and still be afraid of a spider.
MARRIAGE SEMINAR
While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication,
Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor,
"It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and dislikes."
He addressed the man,
"Can you name your wife's favorite flower?"
Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's Pillsbury, isn't it?
WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."
WORDS
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day...
30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"
CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be
so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
"The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!
The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home
and were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him
at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
"Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him,
when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.
SB